As you may remember, back on Halloween, I participated (I would have said raced but we all know I didn't really race...too slow) in the SD State Championship CX race. And after the race, as you also may remember, my picture showed up on the front of the Black Hills Pioneer paper from the Northern Black Hills. WELL, a funny thing happened...
Betsy C., the person that put on the race, sent me a copy of the picture from the paper and on the bottom of said picture, there was a little note saying something to the effect of "I loved the costume, your man-pelt is awesome and if you want a better copy of it, I know the guy that took it and can get you one." OK, maybe some of that was made up, but the promise of a hi-res picture of my gut, man-pelt and rock hard nipples (it was chilly out that day) was real and I took her up on it.
I read All Hail The Black Market on a regular basis and there is some crazy-fun stuff on there and a lot of cross (cyclocross, not cross dressing, though it could be both) references, so I figured that my picture should go to Stevil. So, I sent it with a brief description of what he was seeing, not that the picture wasn't worth a thousand words, and low and behold, he posted it on his blog for all the world to see. Yes, I posted it on my blog a while back too, but I have somewhere around 4 readers and Stevil has at least 1000 readers, so in my world it went viral.
Now, this morning, I get up, do my stupid morning stuff, and plop my ass (which is about as hairy as my chest) down on the couch and check the normal sites I check in the morning. When I am on Dirt Rag's website, where I usually check out the forums, I scroll down to see Team Fubar-Gots some 'splaining to do!. Obviously, I click on the link to re-read my post to Stevil. Now it is on yet ANOTHER website that has a lot more readers than this sad little blog (8600+ members). Holy crap...yep, viral.
That picture is really phenomenal. If you look at it on a hi-def monitor or TV (as I am doing right now) you can actually see my nipples are distended from the cold. Maybe I should grow a man-pelt/comb-over combo to cover those sensitive little suns-a-bitches with some warmth-giving fur. In addition, the pelt is also quite a thing to behold. I often get asked if I shave my legs (a cyclist thing to do) and I always say no. Where the hell would I stop? The top of my thighs? Then I'd look like I was wearing a fur unitard. And if I shaved the whole shootin' match, well, there isn't enough time in the day. I've got too much other shit to do.
Little did I know that acting like a jackass at a cross race, donning only my bib knickers, some arm warmers, a cape, a luchadore mask, growing a beautiful, scintillating man-pelt and exposing my nipples for the world to see would create such a fervor (with a little shameless self-promotion on my part). Good to see the world isn't so serious.
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