Monday, January 25, 2010

I feel like a little kid and not in a good way.

As I mentioned the other day, I had a moment of weakness and said yes to the 24 Hours of Moab (or was tricked into it) so training in earnest has begun.

I kept up some sort of activity during the autumn with some running, bike riding and my weight training 3 days per week so I would not exit the holidays a complete couch slug, only a slight couch slug. All along I had a plan to start a quasi-serious training regimen after the first of the year. Not a New Years Resolution type thing, but just a jump-off point to get started.

Now, my regimen consists of 3 days per week of weight-training and 3 days per week of riding, either indoor or outdoor. When riding indoors, I have some spin videos that have music and "instructions" for the unmotivated to push themselves past a casual spin in the house. But, the weather and indoor riding is a big contributing factor of why I feel like a little kid.

I have owned a trainer for 10+ years. For those of you that might not know, a trainer is a little "A" frame that locks onto your rear wheel. There is a resistance unit that pushes onto your rear wheel giving you something to push against. You sit there and spin away with nowhere to go. I HATE the trainer. Only legs moving which causes your ASS TO KILL. It feels like my t'ain't (or the Brunswicks on women. What is a Brunswick? Well on a bowling ball, it says Brunswick between the two holes...)is getting mashed into my spleen. You never get to shift around, just locked into one position unless you stand up, but there isn't enough resistance (at least on my unit) to keep me from shooting off the bike when trying to stand.

So, I have the grand idea to get some rollers. Rollers will have a far more realistic road feel. I have to shift around to keep balance. It will fine tune my balance. It will improve my spin. What do I have to lose?

Well, for one thing, I'VE NEVER RIDDEN ROLLERS. Little did I know I'd feel like a child learning to ride all over again when on these things. Swerving all over the place, falling off and basically just looking like a complete and utter doofus while riding them. OK, I look like a doofus most of the time, but this makes me look like a class A doofus.
I've got about a week or so of riding on these under my belt now and it isn't as terrible as when I started, but I am good for at least one or two times riding off these fuckin' things and crashing into the back of the couch.

I can just hear it now, "Hey Chris, how did you separate your shoulder?"

"Oh, I crashed my bike."

"Really? You're hard-core. The weather's been terrible outside and you're out riding? NICE!"

"Yeah, I wish. I rode off my rollers and crashed into the back of the couch. When I was falling, I outstretched my arm and separated my shoulder."

"You crashed off your rollers? You pussy...sell your bike and go buy some walking wait, you'd probably fall off a sidewalk or a treadmill...forget it. Buy a helmet and sit on the couch."

Just like that. I can hear it now. Good God, I hope the weather warms up.

Oh, yeah, BTW...I have to share this. We went out running errands yesterday. I went into TWO public restrooms at two different stores in two completely different areas of town. And I mention the two areas of town because it wasn't one sick person going from one store to the next, but likely two different people in two different areas and guess what? Hot shit. I had to inhale someones hot, airborne, shit particles...proves my point. I gotta go rinse my sinuses out yet again...

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